FatherSon Ventures

Building a Relationship through Adventure

Drum Lesson

Written By: Scot Butwell - Feb• 19•15


It is not often a parent gets an impartial view of their child, but while I was deleting old emails, I found one worth saving from his drum teacher Alex, who I met in a recovery group.

Alex volunteered to give D free drum lessons, and after his first lesson,  I had asked Alex to text me a few observations of D’s first lesson—to get a viewpoint other than my own.

I wasn’t sure what to expect from his comments—he had great at my main concern of listening to his teacher—but  they led me to see D in a new light:

“D was a joy to work with and quite an experience. His appreciation of nature and exploration behind the music studio was fun to observe.”

My two cents: His exploration of nature most likely related to anxiety regarding a new social situation.

“Once he was ready to come into the studio, I recognized how delicately he approached each percussion instrument and the way he took his pointer finger and barely pressed down on the piano to get the slightest sound.

I don’t normally associate delicate with my son. He can be loud and impulsive, yes, but I seldom see him as being delicate.

“He took his time to listen to each note, starting from the high part all the way to the low notes. He never bashed or tried to play many notes simultaneously with his whole hand, that was cool.”

I could actually visualize D as a musician from the above comments. That is very cool, indeed.

“I could tell that he was really listening to each sound the drum and cymbals made as opposed to just trying to play as loud as possible and as many instruments at the same time. That is a gift in itself, the gift to listen and enjoy the sound. “

His final comments really made me see D in a new light and believe he might have a gift related to music:

“I could tell that D has a great sense of rhythm and memory as I would play different instruments on the floor or the drum set and he would play back what I had played with little difficulty.”

D is hypersensitivity to loud sounds, which I’ve regarded as a negative thing. However, Alex’s comments showed it could be also be a gift.

“I believe that once he gets acclimated to the studio he will be more comfortable to express his musicality and make some beautiful music.”

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